I should be embarrassed. I mean after all, I am “Crystal”. I use to sit on a sparkly glass shelf in
Neimans, you know, NEIMAN MARCUS! There I was dusted daily and basked under a
bright light that showed off all of my etchings. I was made for wedding registries and destined for a future
alongside the silver platter and Royal Dalton china. I thought my day had come
when I was gifted in 2004. In fairness, I never expected to be an everyday Jane
like those white porcelain plates, nor did I expect to share company with those
Longaberger platters that are brought out for casual gatherings, but for
crying out loud I thought I’d at least be allowed to shimmer in all my glory at
Thanksgiving and Christmas! Were it not for the passing of a grandparent and
subsequent acquisition of a real china cabinet, I would still be tucked in the
back of the kitchen cabinet next to the little used crock-pot. Can you believe
that? A crock-pot for crying out loud! Oh the thought of it is so depressing!
You might think I’m
worse off now. No longer esteemed enough to sit in a china cabinet, I share a
spot on the desk next to an ugly mug with a disfigured face made by an
8-year-old 22 years ago. I suppose he thinks he should be holding coffee if
that is even possible considering his lack of design. Instead he holds pens.
I’ve been sitting next to him for 3 months now collecting mail and holding
reminders. At first his Pinocchio-esque nose and uneven smile made me cringe
and momentarily made me long to be stashed away in the dark next to the
unpolished silver, but he’s been holding pens for 3 years. He is truly a sight
for sore eyes, but considering his tenure as the penholder I figured he knew
something I did not. One day I asked him how he’s managed all these years doing
a job he was not designed to do and he looked at me with that disfigured face
and really bad glaze job and said, “You’re just a bowl. You’re job is to hold
things. Get over yourself.”
